I'm on facebook a lot! I have a lot of people as my friends, some are from my teenage years, some are family, some are from church and some are just people I hang with now. As a matter of fact...some are blogger friends.
Now, my side of the family is pretty spread out. Most of my family in in the Chicago area. That is where my mom grew up and it's where her brother and his family live. Actually, the brother (my uncle) moved to Florida. So see, I've got family in chicago and I've also got family in Florida.
I don't know this side of my family very well. My mom married an army guy and we moved around a lot. I had never met my uncle or cousins until about 5 years ago when my grandma died. Now, we are all on facebook and we are getting to know each other through our comments and our pictures and stuff.
I also have a few of Bossmans family on my facebook. One of them is Bossmans aunt. She lives a few hours from us and we've spent a little time with them on holidays and such. She happens to be the m*uslims sister. Although she's not quite as kooky as her sister...she has issues too.
Last week I posted a video of my daughter performing a song she wrote. She is playing the guitar and singing. She was performing in a coffee shop. I put in on facebook because I'm proud of her and I wanted my family to see what a talented daughter I have, since none of them have met her.
Heres where it gets crazy....(I know, so far this has been a boring story)
As I expected, the usual family and friends commented on what a talent she is. Bossman's aunt..I'll call her K, left a very nice comment. Then...my cousin...we'll call him S, left a comment. The comment was... and I quote:
That was very cool! Tell her she looks and sounds great!
Now, does anyone see anything wrong with that comment? Don't be shy...please..if you see anything remotely harsh or judgemental or bossy, tell me...before you read the rest of this.
Of course there is NOTHING wrong with that statement! It's a very nice statement.
So, why did K feel the need to leave S a comment in his inbox? Not sure...but this is what he sent me....
I got this message from K, I believe. What's up with this?
"The Wildchild's talent can stand on it's own. Telling everyone to tell her she's great is a little controlling, don't cha think. People know talent when they hear it. Tell her yourself, and allow us to do the same. thanks....no offense! "
Did i say something wrong?
Hope you're doing well!
Ok, I changed the names...but this is exactly what he sent me!
I was shocked! Why would she feel the need to email someone she doesn't even know and say something so stupid? He wasn't telling people to tell her she's great...he was telling ME to tell HER that she was great. He isn't friends with her on facebook, they don't know each other, so why would he tell her anything?
Well, needless to say, I was a little ticked off! I mean...seriously? Don't tell my friends what they can and cannot say to me. If he had said something offensive...maybe I could see it....but this? This is just dumb!
So, I wrote her an email...I'll be honest...it wasn't very nice.
I pretty much told her that she must have misunderstood what was being said and that if she has a problem with something that someone says on MY post then she should talk to me about it. Unless I post something controversial, something that I want people to debate...I don't need her to offend people that make nice comments about my daughter!
Then...I committed the unpardonable sin. I deleted her from my friends list!
Now, she did email me back and apologized, but it wasn't a very nice apology, in my book...she sent me this....
Ok OK Ok, my bad. I DID misunderstand. I don't know him, though why does that matter? Anyway, I just know how fragile young talent can be, and I wouldn't want the wildchild thinking that people have to be prodded to tell her she's great. That instills insecurity. Sorry I embarrassed you girl. Pass on my apologies. Though he doesn't sound too forgiving at this point. Please forgive the screw up. I'm a little protective because of my own daughter I guess. Does S own a beebie gun. Sure hope not!
First of all....please don't say "My bad" when apologizing to someone! It's just no good form. It's slangy and it's just something you say when you are trying to be cool. It's fine when goofing around...but if you want to be serious...don't say MY BAD!
Second thing is... My daughter went and read the comments and because she's 18 and immature, she made comments about how ugly she is and how she hated the video. BUT, she thanked everyone for their nice comments. K felt the need to go to my daughters facebook and post on her wall a lecture about how she shouldn't be posting things about herself and she should just take comments nicely.
Now, her point to the wildchild was valid....but....do you lecture someone in public or do you message them in private? AND...isn't it MY job to do the lecturing?
Anyway, back to the point...if I even have one. I deleted her. Now, my kids and my husband did not delete her and that's fine...I don't expect them to. If they want to delete her they can. The only reason I deleted her is because I want to have peace of mine that when I post something about my kids, I won't have her insulting my family or friends.
Does that sound reasonable?
Well, after the last email she sent...I didn't respond. I was over and done with it and I moved on. Oh...I apologized profusely to my cousin and I hope he doesn't stop commenting on my stuff.
So, today, she sent me another email. This is what it said:
I am sorry I offended your friend! I totally misunderstood his comment. My bad, as I said. You didn't have to take me off of your friend list. That's kinda harsh dontcha think. We are FAMILY.
Again with the "My bad"?????
Um....I told her in my last email that he was my FAMILY and I explained the whole thing that I just told you guys....but still...I get this email back.
I haven't responded...instead I come to you. What do you think I should do next? I've already moved on. And although I was upset by the whole thing...it's not like I'll never talk to her again.
So should I make her a friend again? Should I write her another note...or should I just ignore the whole thing? (I like the 3rd option the best)
And finally I ask the biggest question of all...
