The day my life changed forever....

I didn't make a big deal out of this, but on January 15th, it had been 2 years since I got the call that changed my life forever.  Some call it an anniversary, others a cancerversary, but I can't call it that.  Anniversaries are happy events and that was definitely not a happy event.

I may have already told this story...but I feel the need to tell it again.
I'll never forget that day.  It was a typical Friday.  I was waiting for the results of the biopsy, but I wasn't expecting the call that day.  They said 24 to 48 hours for results and my doctors are notorious for never calling at all, so I was fully expecting to have to call myself on Tuesday, as Monday was a holiday.

They called my cellphone....weird because they NEVER call my cell phone.  She, (my doctor) was very matter of fact about the matter.  "Yes, it's cancer, don't worry, we will get you an appointment with an oncolgist and surgeon."  "Any questions?"

Me?  "Uh, so...it's cancer?"

Me? "Ok, thanks."

Who says thanks after someone tells them that? 

I was alone at the time.  The wildchild was in her room, still sleeping.  I sat still thinking for a moment.  I was trying to wrap my brain around it.  Cancer...cancer...cancer.

I needed to call people.  I needed to call Bossman.

For some reason I felt like I should go in the bedroom to make the calls.  I have to pass the wildchilds bedroom to get to mine.  She came out the door right when I walked by. 

I lost it.

As a parent, you never want to lose it in front of your child.

I did.

I sobbed like a big old baby in my daughters arms.

It was humiliating.

I gathered myself and went in the bedroom to call Bossman.  Why is it when there is something major going on that nobody answers their phone.

So Bossman didn't answer.  I called my mom.  She didn't answer.  I called my best friend.  Finally, someone answered!

After playing phone tag, I finally got a hold of Bossman.  Of course he came home immediately.  My mom soon followed.

I remember being alone with Bossman for a few minutes and we just stared at each other.  The scared look in his eyes was enough to freak me out.  He sat me on the bar stool and he kneel next to me so I was looking down at him.  He said that now was the time to pray.  We clung to each other and he prayed.

And then, he pretty much said exactly what this song says...so I'll leave you with this song.  Everytime I hear it, it brings tears to my eyes.  BUT...I never change the station or turn the song off.  Because this song is my life and I have to face my life.

I'm lucky.  I am still here.  I thank God everyday for that gift.  The gift of life.




Written while ignoring laundry by::