I would just like to thank you all for your comments on my last post. You are all such wise people.
I'm a pretty forgiving person. A lot of you mentioned forgiving my father. Although in my mind, I've forgiven him, maybe my heart hasn't done the same.
I've been thinking it over quite a bit and I'm still unsure what I feel about the whole thing. A part of me would love to just forget about him and not deal with him anymore. Another part of me wants to keep in my life..."just in case". I'm not sure what the "just in case" is all about, but I feel like if I don't keep him in my life...I might be missing out on something.
Of course, the other part of me wants to keep the door open for my kids. Although they have never met him, he sends them cards and such, I would hate to shut that door on them. Maybe someday they would like to get to know their grandfather.
See, I grew up in an Army brat home. So we moved...ALOT! I never really had family around. It was just my mom, step dad, brother and sister. I had grandparents that visited once a year and that was IT! I never met my uncle, my cousins or any other family until I became an adult. I always wanted to have a big family. I think it's because I didn't have one. So, I don't want my kids to feel like they missed out on anything. (Ok, I'm just being a mother here, and chances are they could care less...)
Well, luckily my sis hasn't posted a whole bunch of stuff on Facebook. Maybe she knows I'll see it and won't like it. She's just been posting generic stuff like "she's just hanging with family and friends." She hasn't posted any pics or stuff, but I imagine, because I'm such a lurker and because I'm incredibly nosey, I'll look at them if she posts them.
Anyway, there isn't much gratitude in this post...so let's just get right to it!
Trees: I love trees! I love looking at them, taking pictures of them, sitting by them. They are majestic and I wish I could make them talk. I'm sure they have stories to tell.
Travel: I'm not a big traveller, but once I'm out there, I enjoy it. I only wish I could take my house with me everywhere we went. Then....travel would be PERFECT!
Talking: Talking is a great way to meet people. DUH!
Trains: I like trains by default. Bossman loves trains and has a miniature train in our garage. My grandfather worked for Southern Pacific for over 20 years. I guess trains were just meant to be in my life.
Telephones: How would we live without telephones? Or cell phones? I can't even imagine it!
Turkey: Well, Thanksgiving is the time for turkey and for gratitude so I LOVE turkey!
Tea: Iced Tea is lovely to drink on a hot day.
Well, if I want to post this before Wednesday is over, I better stop the list now.
Have a great day and don't forget to be grateful!
Grace, I read your last post, I could add nothing to what had already been said.
ReplyDeleteThe advise was good it seemed to me, I hope that it helped.
Love and warm hugs,
Paul.
Grace, I think the way you're handling this is perfect. My kids are handling their dad, my ex, in a similar way. They are polite, they haven't cut him out of their lives (although they have both told me several times they wish they could, just because they don't want the drama; they often say they hope he moves to Russia to be with his gf and they don't have to deal with him anymore) but they haven't cut him officially out of their lives.
ReplyDeleteAt this point, that isn't necessary. He hasn't intruded upon them to that point. And he probably won't. And your dad probably won't either.
Just like my ex probably knows some of what is going on with his kids, your dad isn't stupid either.
You *may* have to one day have a heart-to-heart with your sister, though, but again, if that time comes when you have to tell her specifically to butt out when it comes to your dad, you'll know. :)
I think your attitude is completely reasonable and sound. :)