My life, the soap opera

Have I told you lately what's been going on at Casa de Grace?

First, let's discuss the wildchild. Do you like good news or bad news first?

Ok, good news first. Over the holiday break, she passed her drivers permit exam! Ok, it's not exactly good news for me, but it's great news for her. This means she can legally drive with someone that is over 25. I informed her, that I was only 24 and therefore she couldn't drive with me. Of course, she demanded to see my own licence and therefore found out I am NOT, in fact, 24. Believe me when I say, I don't look a day over 24. I have a supermodel body and flawless skin. Believe me also, when I say, I have swamp land in Arizona that I would love to sell you!

BUT, I have figured out how to get out of letting her drive me around. I make loud sudden noises, I cling to the dashboard. I act as frightened as possible. (This is easy to do since I AM scared out of my wits!) She has informed me that this makes her way too nervous and has decided it's NO fun driving with Mom!

Oh, that only lasted for about a week. She's over it now. ~sigh~

Now the bad news. This is the part of parenthood that I hate. This is the part of teenagers that I hate. I recieved a letter in the mail telling me that the wildchild is truant!

That's right. She has decided that school is not important and she has been ditching classes. Of course the first thing I want to know is, WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?? She claims she hangs out in the bathroom. The BATHROOM???

What? Why? How? These are the thoughts that flashed through my head before it exploded! That's right, brain juice all over the table.


After I got my head back together I had to ask... What is going on in the bathroom? To which she replied, they just hang out in there and talk and IM people on their phones. ~sigh~

Anyway, turns out, the school had the wrong phone number listed for us, so that is why I didn't get any of the calls about her being absent. Also turns out, I did NOT kill her. Although the thought did cross my mind, right before my head exploded. A

So, as it stands now, she is ground for a month. ~sigh~ It's going to be a LOOOOONGGG month. She has lost her cell phone and computer for a month, and she isn't going to the dance on Saturday. I've found out, if you go on myspace you can see when a person has last logged in. So if I go on her myspace and I see she logged in, we will add a week to her grounding. God! I hate being a parent to a teen!!! It sucks!

Well, am I being to soft? Should I be tougher? I don't really know what to do. We are thinking of putting her on independant study. She says she wants to do that. I'm not sure what to think of it. I've talked to her guidance counselor, and they think she could be a good canidate for it. But then she would be home all day! Do I really want her home all day? I could keep better track of her. But what the heck would I do with her? Further more, and most importantly, when would Bossman have the time to spank me??

I don't know what the answers are, I just thought if I wrote them all down it would come to me...like a vision or something...but it's not happening. Maybe I should meditate. OOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM.................

Nope, not helping.

You know what would really help? I know you know what I know.

A spanking.

That would help.

Bossman is on his way home for lunch.

He is the long arm of the law.

Does it help to have a sore butt when thinking about serious things?

I'll let you know....

later...

A new Sheriff in town

The law has been laid down at my house.

Bossman is the long-arm of the law. He carries with him a badge and very mean looking backscratcher. If I wasn't sitting on the evidence, I would hardly believe it. So for all you detail whores, and those of you more refined detail connisseurs, and I think you know who you are, here it is.

Monday started off as most Mondays go. I got up to make the little mans lunch, and fix him breakfast. Bossman takes him to school on his way to work. I then headed back to my very warm and comfy bed. After a mid morning nap, I got up and surfed all my favorite blogs. After surfing, and watching cheesy morning shows, I decided I should get dressed. Ok, it was 1:00. Sheez, do you have to know EVERYTHING??

I got dressed and looked around. Wow, this house is a mess, I thought. So, I decided to do what any normal person would do. I went and played Zuma on the computer while watching Peoples Court.

It was about that time that Bossman came home for lunch. I made grilled cheese and we watched the Peoples Court. Then, it happened.

He stands up and comes over to me. He turns off the tv and grabs my hands to pull me off the couch. I know what this means and I'm not too happy about it. Remember, my butt was just toasted a day and a half ago! But Bossman says we need to talk and talking is much better in the bedroom. I had a bad feeling I wasn't going to like this talk!

First thing he does when we get into the bedroom is stick my nose against the wall. That wall and I are becoming such great friends. I think I should name the wall. Wall seems so impersonal. But, I digress...

Bossman then pulls my sweats down to my thighs. Did I mention the fact that I didn't really get dressed, I mostly just changed out of my pj bottoms into my sweats. Well after a few minutes of fuming, me, not him, he pulls me over his lap. I wasn't a very happy camper, seeing as how he had the BS in his hand. I tried to protest. I tried whining. I tried all my regular tricks for getting out of it. Didn't work.

After a couple of hours of stinging slaps from the BS, Bossman said we needed to talk. Ok, it was more like a couple of minutes, but it's hard to say for sure since there wasn't a clock handy for me to time it with. Have you ever tried to have a normal conversation while laying over someones knee? It's HARD!

Just when Bossman was about to start talking, the phone rang. Oh great, I thought this was my big break. I thought I was saved by the bell. Once again, I was wrong. Unlucky for me, the phone was sitting right next to him on the bed. ~sigh~ So much for my luck. He held a conversation with whoever was on the phone while I was still over his knee. He continued swatting my behind every once in awhile, I think that was just to make sure I didn't fall asleep. After about an hour long conversation...again, I didn't have a clock nearby, so it could have been a minute or it could have been an hour... he finally hangs up the phone.

Now it was time for the conversation. I will try and be as accurate as possible with this conversation, but I was under stress, so I can't promise that this will be accurate. Have you ever had a conversation with someone while over their knee while they are wielding a BS?? I may have already asked that question, but remember the stress I was under!

So, needless to say, Bossman did most of the talking. He talked about things like cleaning and getting dressed and..well...This is mostly what I heard....

Bossman: "Young lady, you need to get back into the swing of things, things like laundry and a clean bathroom...blah, blah, blah, blah, What do you think?"

Me: "Ah, what?"

Bossman: swat, swat, swat, with the BS

Me: "Oh, yes, ouch, yes, your right honey!"

Well, needless to say, I think I got the picture. It all boils down to this. I need to get off my lazy butt and do something around this house. I need to get dressed during the day instead of staying in my pjs until just before the kids come home from school. I need to clean the bedroom and bathroom everyday, and if I don't....well the BS is going to be used alot more often.

Finally, I had a deadline. I had to take care of stuff today, or the BS would be used again. As much as that sounds like fun to all of you, my butt has had just about enough...at least for the next day or two! So I think instead of writing this, I better get moving. I really don't want another date with the BS today.

So, I think I'll take my pillow off the chair and put it back on the bed, of course I'll be getting dressed and cleaning the bedroom and bathroom. Last time I was in the bathroom I heard the toilet brush calling my name.

I'll tell you what, the long-arm of the law has spoken, so as a law abiding citizen I think I'll follow the law.....

at least until tomorrow!

later.........

Dear Diary

You'll never guess what happened to me yesterday! I think yesterday was the best day ever!

Bossman and I came home from church and snuggled in bed together. There was alot of touching and I even had an orgasm. Whoo hoo for me! ;)

The wildchild went to a friends house for the night, so the afternoon was spent with the little man. We went to the park and fed the ducks and then we played in the play ground. I just love the swings. They are my favorite.

In the evening the little man went over to a neighbors house to play video games. Bossman and I snuggled on the couch, ate some pizza and watched a movie. After the movie, the little man was still out, so Bossman decided it was a good time to give me a spanking. Yesterday I had been very moody and not pleasant to be around. Bossman decided I needed a reminder of how a loving wife should act.

After a bit of fussing, we made it to the bedroom. Bossman re-introduced me to the corner. It's not really a corner, more of a wall, but I haven't seen it for awhile, so Bossman felt I should be re-introduced. I had got re-acquainted with the wall with my pants down around my thighs. Bossman decided which of our lovely implements he would be using on my poor bottom. When he was ready he steered me over to the bed and bent me over his knee. Bossman told me we were going to proceed with 3 phases and phase 1 was a warm up. He used his hand to warm my bottom up quite nicely. Just when it was starting to get a little too uncomfortable for my taste, he told me we were starting phase 2. Apparently phase 2 consisted of the BS (backscratcher) and our new wooden spatula.

Diary, this was painful. It was very hard to tell what he was using. I thought he was using the big wooden spoon. But I deserved this, and frankly I needed it. Phase 2 wasn't really that fun. As a matter of fact, my buns are quite red today. To tell the truth, I like that the best. I like when I can feel it the next day. To me, that is a REAL spanking.

After phase 2, (which I thought would never end, but ended all too soon) Bossman stood me up and put me back against the wall. The wall was never my friend and this night was no exception. My buns were on fire, but my heart was in love. Bossman said it was time for phase 3. He placed the wooden spoon in my hands, that were behind my back. WHAT??? That couldn't possibly be phase 3. I thought he already used that, and plus, I was already pretty sore. I started to protest. He brought me back to his knee but said he couldn't believe that I was protesting after such a hard spanking. Then he said he was starting phase 3, was I ready? I tried to brace myself for more assault to my behind. Suddenly, I felt cool relief. Phase 3 turned out to be lotion on my sore behind. Thank goodness for THAT. Shame on Bossman for tricking me so cruelly. (it was actually pretty funny!)

After phase 3 we figured the little man would be home soon so we went back to the living room to watch TV. I actually thought laying was much more comfortable than sitting as I could pull my legs up on the back of the couch and would not have to have my buns directly affected. The little man did come home and we spent about another hour just hanging out together.

The little man finally went to bed. We decided snuggling in bed was good idea. Snuggling in bed turned out to be a GREAT idea. After much touching and fondling, one thing led to another and we were at it again. Twice this week we've made love twice in one day. This is unheard of around here. Can you believe it?

Well Diary, I guess now you can see why this was the best day ever!

Love,
grace

Welcome home, Libido!

My libido has returned! It must have had a great time over at Theresas because it's refreshed and ready to go.

This has been a terrific week for sex in my house. The day after the spanking, Bossman stayed home from work in the morning and we had a great time in bed. It was nice to feel like a human being instead of a patient!

Yesterday, Bossman came home for lunch. After he ate, he decided he wanted to try out our new toy. OUCH is the word that comes to mind at the moment. That sucker hurts. But guess what? Bossman thinks it's great. It has a nice comfortable rubber handle, I mean really, we wouldn't want the poor man to have a sore hand or anything. It's also relatively quiet. The slapping sound is not too loud. Did I mention that it HURTS?

So, I managed to convince Bossman that my butt was not ready for too much abuse, so we ended up under the covers instead. Sex in the afternoon is very very yummy. It can be such a pick-me-up, I highly recommend it.

So, last night, we were cuddling in bed watching my NEW favorite show, Armed and Famous. (if you haven't watched this show yet, WATCH it. It is so funny and makes me laugh.) While laying there, I let my hand wander down to Bossmans goods. Watching tv and snuggling and touching...doesn't get much better than this! Ok, it got better. He started touching me, and guess what people....two O's in one day! I tell ya, this hasn't happened in MONTHS!

Ahhh, I tell ya, it's good to be back!

later.......

Diagnosis or spanking?

Here it is people, the moment you've all been waiting for...oh wait a minute, this was the moment I've been waiting for! Well, anyway, here it is, the offical diagnosis. Yes, I really was sick and it has a name.

Pericarditis. There, I said it. Now you're probably asking yourself, what the heck is that? Don't feel bad, the doctor told me all about it, and I still had to google it when I got home.

Pericarditis is an infection around the heart. Actually, it's fluid around the heart. After reading all the details on net, that is exactly what I had. Exactly!

Lucky for me, things could have been worse. If the fluid gets really bad, they put a needle in and take out the fluid. Let's just all be glad THAT didn't have to happen to me.

I am feeling better, but I have been having shortness of breath. My doctor has said that the pericdarditis could have led to myocarditis, which is a weakening of the heart muscle. Yippee. He said this could take a couple of months to heal, or it could stay like that forever. I decided my heart will be better soon. I don't even want to know what happens if it doesn't get better...I'm just not going there.

So, there it is. Sounds like fun, doesn't it? But speaking of fun, let me tell you about the fun I had the other night....heh heh heh

The other night, everyone was out of the house. The wildchild was at a friends house and the little man was out to dinner with his friend. We were suddenly home alone and I wasn't feeling sick. This hasn't happened since 1998, I mean, since Novemeber. We were watching Tv when Bossman came over to me and started pulling me up from the sofa. I wasn't sure where this was going, but I was pretty sure it involved something wooden. (he he, wooden! Was I talking about his..ya know...or the new toy? Ha, I just cracked myself up...I am so pathetic..LOL) ANYWAY...Bossman starts pulling me toward the bedroom. Oh man. I could tell by the look in his eye, he had plans for BOTH wooden things. Remember, my libido was still on vacation at Theresas. I think it likes it over there.

So, into the bedroom we go. I'm getting pretty nervous. I haven't been spanked for a LONG time. I know how much it hurts when you haven't been spanked for awhile. So I wasn't very excited. I tried really hard to get out of it, but eventually, I was over his knee with my pants down around my ankles. The good news was, he didn't get out the wooden thingie. He used his hand. Ahhh, his hand. My most favorite of all spanking implements. Who doesn't like being spanked with a hand?

Ok, he did bring out the dreaded backscratcher. That was only because I put up such a fuss. Why do I have to open my big mouth? Anyway, he mostly used his hand, but he did use the BS and it hurt like hell. It's times like those I ask myself...what the heck am I thinking? Lucky for me, that thought goes away pretty quickly.

It was pretty short, but sweet. It was the opening for things to come. We didn't have sex, for the kids were due home any minute, but the spanking was just what the doc ordered. It was the first step back to being normal. I didn't get breathless or have any trouble whatsoever, unless you include the pain from the BS. But it was heaven.

So there you have it. The first spanking of the brand new year. I can only hope that was just a preview of the things to come this year. I have a feeling this is going to be a GREAT year.

Oh, don't worry, the sex came yesterday! But I didn't want to give out all the details in one post...what would I write about tomorrow?

Now, I'm off to Eva's . She better have details, or I'm sending Adam the BS.

later.......

Happy Birthday

Thank you so much for your wonderful garden! I have found warmth, friendship, growth and acceptance in your wonderful garden.

I hope you have a wonderful Birthday!

Love,
Grace

MIA

I'm so sorry for the lack of posts lately. I haven't really felt up to posting anything. For awhile there I thought I was getting better. I went almost a whole week without a fever and I was feeling great. But then I started feeling bad again.

The good news is I haven't had a fever for over a week. I just don't feel well. I wish I could pinpoint what extactly is the problem, but I can't and neither can the Doc. I'm changing Docs, so I will be going to a new one next week. I'm hoping a new perspective will be a good thing and maybe he'll think of something the other did not.

Something else disappeared...my sex drive. Did someone steal it when I wasn't looking? Did it run away because it wasn't being used enough? Come back sex drive...please. I'll be good too you. Bossman would love you forever. I'm thinking about putting up missing signs. Offering a reward might help. I could try milk cartons. It's probably just on vacation because of the illness. Who can blame it for leaving? It hasn't really been a party around here...unless you call a pity party fun.

My mood is low. It's so hard to be positive when things bad. I've tried. I've tried to be a positive as possible during the holidays. I had too for the kids. But now the holidays are over, the kids are back in school and I am free to feel sorry for myself.

So, there it is. It's not pretty people. It's old and tired. It's all about wondering...why me? How did this happen? When will it be over? Boo hoo, poor me!

Don't worry, I can't be in this mood for long. It's not really me. I just need something good to write about. Anything good would help. Maybe my sexdrive will be come home soon. Maybe Bossman will decide it's time for a spanking. That great wooden thingy is still waiting to be opened.

Any of these things could happen, and will happen. When? I'm not sure, but for now, I'm going to eat cheetos. That's right, cheetos...and nobody better try and stop me!

later......

10 things

I took a look at my blog today and realized it looked like an Easter egg threw up all over my screen. So I changed it to the boring look. I just don't want to mess with it right now. All the templates are boring. Maybe the New year will bring New inspiration. Maybe.

I know this should be a New Years post. But since I haven't really celebrated the holidays in a normal fashion, I figured, Why start now?

So instead I give you the top 10 things that make being sick during the holidays worthwhile.

1. Instead of going to my MIL's house for Thanksgiving, I got to go to the Urgent care who immediately sent for an ambulance to take me to the hospital. I'll do ANYTHING to get out of going to the MILs house.

2. Spending the next 2 days in the hospital, was a nice relaxing way to spend the Thanksgiving weekend. I didn't have to brave the after thanksgiving sales, I didn't have a ton of dishes to do and I didn't have to get sick of turkey!

3. Being waited on hand and foot by an extremely worried husband is a wonderful way to be sick.

4. Having said worried husband take showers with you, wash every part of your body including your hair, while all you do is stand there....is there anything better than that? (oh yes, he was there for almost every shower....what a MAN!)

5. Your very worried hubby then blow drys your hair for you so you don't have to lay down with wet hair. Did I mention I've never been so pampered.

6. Being sick is a great excuse for getting out of anything. Christmas cards? Sorry, too sick. Boring Christmas parties, again, too sick.

7. Did I mention no christmas shopping? I only stepped into 2 stores this christmas. The crowds were mean.

8. Everyone came to ME for the holidays. No driving around to everyone house for Christmas eve and Christmas day....they all came to ME!

9. No work for me. No cooking, no cleaning, just sitting on the couch watching old christmas movies. Sounds fun huh? Well, it was fun for about the first hour, then it was just boring! And the not working part....not as easy as it sounds people! I had to watch as things were NOT done the way I would have done them....oh wait, this is suppose to be GOOD reasons....sorry.

10. The best reason of all is all the wonderful comments and e-mails I received from all of you. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, YOU guys are the BEST! It really cheers a person up to know they are being thought of and prayed for! From people that just know me from the blog...how GREAT is that?

So, there you have it. I just KNOW you all are jealous now! I know you all wish YOU had been sick over this holiday season. What? You don't? Well, I don't blame you, cuz frankly it was miserable. But if I had to be sick, I wanted to make sure and point out the good parts, because the reality is, this was a hard list to come up with. I could have come up with 50 bad things. But I didn't want to bring you all down. See, how nice I am? I'm always thinking of you guys.

BTW, the fever returneth. But I'm ok. And next year....things are gonna be so much BETTER!!!!

later........

Too long

5 days without a fever...it's party time!

It's been too long since I've looked at my blog. It's been WAY too long since I've talked about spanking. Actually, it's been WAY, WAY too long since I've gotten a spanking!

So, I guess this means I'm feeling better. I mean, when your sick and feverish, spanking just doesn't cross your mind. Now? Now I keep wondering how long it will be before I get a spanking.

Here's the low-down. Bossman had a birthday on the 29th of Nov. We had sex that morning. Somehow I managed to pull enough energy out of my body to have sex. That really was my present to him. Since then....NOTHING. Well, let me back track a tad. We did have sex a couple of days ago. So, we went almost a MONTH! A MONTH people. I haven't gone that long without sex since I had my babies.

Now, what about spankings? NONE. Nothing. Zero. NADA.

Spanking has been nothing but a distant memory. A memory of better days. A memory of days when sickness didn't prevail. Ahhh, thank god for memories!

Now, there was one little spanking highlight. 2 days before Christmas, I actually ventured out of my house. Since it looked as if the fever would pass me by, I took full advantage. Bossman took me shopping. We went out about 9:30 at night, hoping to avoid the crowds. Didn't work. Crowds were everywhere, and for the first time in a month, I felt like a normal person. We decided to head to the 99.cent store. It is really a great store, and you can get GREAT stuff there. I was on the hunt for stocking stuffers.

One thing you should know about this store. It is a GREAT place to find spanking implements. Bossman never misses an opportunity to look at all the kitchen stuff, just to find the perfect spanking toy. This trip was NO exception. Bossman found a wonderful little wooden spatula thingy. It has a nice rubber handle, but I'm not sure about the slats. Actually, upon second look, it doesn't look that fun. But at this point, I'll take anything. Even a swat will do.

Well, here, just take a look at the picture. Doesn't it look scary?

So, lets keep hoping the fevers stay away. I'm looking forward to a very healthy 2007! With lots of spankings! And sex. And cheetos. And.......

later.....

Update: I must have jinxed myself because last night I got another fever. Not bad, but still. I'm waiting on the doctor to get a test result back, but so far nothing has come up. See what happens when I start thinking about spanking???

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I couldn't possibly forget about Gratitude Tuesday, seeing as how it's the last letter and all. But....

I've been having a really hard time finding anything to be grateful for, other than Bossman. (ok, the kids can be in that catagory too!)

It's very hard to find things to be thankful for when you can't really do much. I haven't sent out Christmas cards, I haven't baked a thing. I haven't even bought a single present. This has been the most UN-christmas I've ever experienced.

Ok, don't feel bad for me. We aren't totally in the dark here. Bossman got the tree, the kids decorated the tree and the house. Bossman has done some shopping, (thanks e-bay) although even that is a challenge as things are getting lost in the mail.

So, I finally realized something, while watching the Grinch. Christmas is going to come. It will be here in less than a week. It will come whether we have packages, ribbons and bows. It will come whether we have tinsel or turkey or cookies. Christmas WILL come. It will come whether I am sick or well. It will still come.

So, Today, The Day to be Grateful, I am grateful for Christmas. I am grateful for the family I have. I am grateful that it will come whether I want it too or not. Nothing else matters. The cookies don't matter, the gifts don't matter, the tinsel and the turkey, DO NOT MATTER!

Really, it only matters that I am here, with my family, on Christmas. And for that I will be forever grateful!

Oh yeah, the letter is Z, so here is my very short Z list.

zebras
zingers (yummy)
zippers (always helpful)
zzzzzz (if I get a good night sleep, I'm deeply grateful.)
zipidy do da...zipidy day, my oh my what a wonderful day, plenty of sunshine headin my way, zipidy do da, zipidy day!
zoinks (Scooby doo and Shaggy were always a favorite of mine)
zest
zip (oh how I'd love to get my zip back)


Have a wonderful Z day, and hug your family for heavens sake!!!

later.........

Meme

The phone rings. Who do you want it to be? Bossman or my friend, A.

When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? Nope, I'm lazy. I find the nearest place to park it where it won't roll. (I know, I'm a horrible person!)

In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener? Both

Do you take compliments well? No, but I'll take one from Bossman anyday!

Are you an active person? I try

If abandoned alone in the wilderness, do you survive? If we are close to the Hilton, I'll survive.
Do you like to ride horses? sure, the ones on the merry-go-round.

Did you ever go to camp as a kid? Yes, loved going to church camp!

What was your favorite game as a kid? Operation

A sexy person is pursuing you, but you know that he/she is married, would you? Of course...the only sexy person persuing me would be Bossman, he is definately married!

Are you judgmental? I'd like to say I'm not, but I think I am more than I think.

Do you like to pursue or be pursued? Who's pursuing? If it's the police, no thanks, if it's Bossman...good ahead, make my day!

Use three words to describe yourself. fun, serious, sick

If you had to choose, would you rather be deaf or blind? It would be hard to be either, but I really would miss the sounds of the world, mostly music, so I would rather be blind.

Are you continuing your education? I like to think that I learn something everyday.

Do you know how to shoot a gun? Water guns are my speciality.

How often do you read books? Bossman would say TOO much...I LOVE books! I LOVE reading!!!

Do you think more about the past, present or future? The here and now, thank you.

What is your favorite children's book? Guess how much I love you.

Have you kissed any of your MySpace friends? Yep, most of my friends on myspace are family.

How tall are you? 5’10”

Where is your ideal house located? On the Beach

Boxers, briefs, thongs, panties, or grannies? panties

Last person you talked to? Bossman

Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? Who hasn't?

When was the last time you were at Olive Garden? 6 months ago.

What are your keys on your key chain for? The house, my car, my church, my bedroom door, my fireproof box.

Where was the furthest place you traveled today? My sons school, about 1 mile away.

Where is your current pain? in my chest.

Do you like mustard? Yep, love mustard!

Do you prefer to sleep or eat? I prefer eating in bed.

Do you look like your mom or dad? My mom

How long does it take you in the shower? As long as the hot water lasts

Can you do a split? I can do a mean banana split, with whipped cream and cherries.

What movie do you want to see right now? The Santa Clause 3

What did you do for New Year's? pig out, watch Dick Clark, and play games with the kids.

Do you think "The Grudge" was scary? Hate scary movies.

What was the cause of your last accident? A truck rear-ended a car who then rear-ended me! ORRRRR....Yesterday I knocked over the tv tray holding my glass of oj and it spilled all over the floor. I was definately the cause of that one!

Happy Birthday Friend!

Count your age by friends
not years,
Judge your life by smiles,
not tears!

LOVE YOU!
Grace

Blogger is being a PIG!

A good friend e-mailed me, to tell me that blogger was being a pig. Actually, numerous friends e-mailed me with similar responses, but I like the pig one the best! So most people had to e-mail thier comments on the Why post. Thanks everyone for your comments!

I hate talking about my illness all the time, so I will try not to bring it up to much anymore, but I just wanted to give a small update, so you will know where things stand.

I feel WAY better than I did last week. I had lots of pain, couldn't sleep or eat. At least this week I can do those things. Be grateful for eating and sleeping.

I'm still fighting something though, and the doctors don't know what it is. They have ran just about every test in the book, from thyroid to diebetes, but nothing has turned up. I'm still on some heart meds, to keep my rate from skyrocketing. But everyday I run a fever. Today, I'm at 101. But the fever is like some yo-yo over which I have no control. I'll wake up feeling ok, normal fever, thinking, wow, I'm finally getting better, to an hour later having a fever of 101. 3 to 4 hours later, my fever will drop to normal, or below normal. Somtimes as low as 96. I don't know what to think of all this. I've never been sick like this, and the unknown is a scary place to be.

Anyway, this is the update. I think I will try to put things on this blog that have nothing to do with sickness for awhile. As soon as I find out what the problem is, or as soon as I go a couple of days with no fever...You all will be the first to know. So the posts may not be as many, but I hope to be a little more upbeat over here. They say laughter is the best medicine, so maybe if I just put my mind to upbeat things, I'll feel better. Again, thanks for all the support! You guys are the BEST!

later......

whY?

I'm hoping today is the letter Y. Even if it's not, I'm going with it because it just seems it fits.

The last couple of weeks have really taught me some very valuable lessons. I've never been so sick in my life. So most of the time I kept asking myself why.

Why did this happen to me?
Why did this happen now?
Why did my children have to go through this?
Why did Bossman have to be so scared?
Why couldn't I just get better?

The last why is the easiest to answer because today I'm feeling much better. The road to recovery will be long but recovery is what it will be.

The rest of the whys, I can't answer. I don't know why this happened to me. I don't know why it happened now. I don't know why the kids or Bossman had to deal with this. But I do know something.

It doesn't matter. It happpened. It could have been worse. But it wasn't. The truth of the matter is, I have been humbled. Being unable to care for yourself or even make a decision for yourself is hard. I have learned that my husband loves me no matter what. He will do anything possible to make me happy, better, comfortable. I believe my husband would sell his soul for me if he had to. That is a powerful thing to realize. I don't believe I am worthy of such love, but I won't question that love ever again. So "why", for me, doesn't really matter anymore.

But I am grateful for "why". If I hadn't wondered why, I may not be the person I am today. If I had taken things for granted, instead of asking why, what kind of person would that have made me?

I will probably always ask why. I know, I just said, why doesn't matter anymore. And for now it doesn't. It doesn't matter why my husband loves me, he just does. It doesn't matter why I got sick, it just matters that I am getting better. It doesn't matter why my children had to go through this, it will make them stronger people and maybe they will appreciate things more. (I can hope, right?)

Maybe for this day, set aside the why. Just enjoy the because, and leave it at that.

Oh, just thought I'd mention, I REALLY love candied yams . The song Yesterday, by the Beatles, really got me through this sickness. The color yellow is a happy color. Yoodlers make me smile. Anybody remember Yertle the turtle? Spankings are yummy, but IV's are yucky!

Last but not least, YOU ! Thank you all again for your love and support during this very diffcult time. I've read all the comments. I've read all the e-mails. They have made me smile. I've had people that I didn't even know read my blog send me well wishes. For this I am eternally grateful! YOU are the best Y of all!

later.......

Still alive, but not up to kicking yet!

Thank you all for your good thoughts and prayers. Bossman is taking extra special care of me. Still not sure what the prob is, but today is a good day, so we'll just go with that for now.

As for this post, I wrote it about 2 weeks ago, when I was having a good day! It's old and most of you probably won't even know what it's about, but hey...it's all I've got, and it's the thought that counts right?? If your still confused, read this, it might clear things up!



Last week, in my feverish haze, I had a crazy dream....

It was WEIRD.

See, Elis and Theresa and I were at Pauls. That's right...Pauls.

Elis kept muttering how she wanted a crop and she gosh darn better get one for christmas or Nick was going to be in big trouble. I'm not sure why, but Theresa was going around spewing coke on people. Remember, I had a fever.

Meanwhile...

I was trying to give a blow job to someone, but when I realized it wasn't Bossman, I pushed him down the stairs. I didn't realize I could be so mean, but if I decide to give ANYONE a blow job then Bossman is the ONLY guy I'm giving BJs to. Thank goodness this was only a dream. And frankly, bj's only happen in Bossmans dreams, so that was just strange.

I was wandering around Pauls place looking for Eva and Tiggr. I mean really, what's a party without those two gals? Elis informed me that Eva didn't come. I was really upset that she wasn't there. How can we have a party without her? Elis was keeping her informed by e-mail, but really, how can you truly have a party if one of your best buds isn't there???

Next thing I know, we are heading to Shy's house. Now, I don't know Shy very well, so I really didn't know what to expect. Once we got to Shys she started taking a survey. It was all about floggers, crops and paddles. I really haven't had any experience with any of those things and so I just sat back and listened.

Well, it wasn't nearly as exciting as I thought. There were no spankings. What a rip off! It was just a bunch of questions! Who likes this...who likes that...who likes both...who likes all of the above...blah blah blah....

This was beginning to sound like a freakin math equation! I couldn't believe I was dreaming about MATH! My fever must have really been HIGH!

Anyway, all I know is that there were alot of people at the party. There were no spankings, and frankly I don't even remember there being any snacks! Seeing as how I was trying to give someone a bj...this was really a NIGHTMARE!

Next time I decide to have a party with you guys, I don't want any mention of blowjobs...I want lots of snacks..cheetos are my snack of choice (although at the moment cheetos and all other high salt foods are strictly a no-no) and for heaven sakes lets have SPANKINGS!!!

As for Eva, she better be at the next party, for I need her there when things start getting mathy.

later....

sick of being sick

Yep, I'm still sick!

My heart is better it seems, but I'm still fighting some sort of infection that nobody can pin-point.

The docs are baffled.

I am just SICK of being SICK!

The worst part of this pity-party is, I can't even have cheetos! (too much salt)

So, let's review...

I can't have cheetos...

Nobody knows what I have....

I'm still sick...

Yep, that about covers it!

later......

Hello

Hello Everyone!

I am at such a loss for words, I'm not even sure what to write. Your comments made me smile and your prayers and well wishes did wonders for my mind. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! You all will never know how wonderful you made me feel.

The good news is, I'm getting better. The bad news is, the meds I'm on make me very tired all the time, so I can't spend more than a few minutes on the computer. I would love to respond to all the well wishers and the e-mails, but that will have to wait for a little while more.

Nobody is quite sure what my problem is. I went to the doctor today, and he is going to follow up with the ER docs and the cardioligist. They think I have a viral infection that was attacking my heart. The hope is once the infection is gone, I will be back to my normal bratty self. For now, I stay on the meds and be very tired. Better that, than having my heart jump around like crazy.

Things like this always put things in perspective. My thanksgiving weekend was a nightmare I hope to never have to relive. But I found out that there are way more important things in the world than turkey and stufffing.

Yesterday was Bossman's birthday. I could never, ever have made it through this without him. The look of worry on his face as I was being rushed into the ER is not a look I ever want to see on his face again. He made decisions for me, he held me, he sat in uncomfortable chairs for hours, so that he would not have to leave my side. I would fall asleep in my hospital bed with him holding my hand and wake up with him still there watching over me. He asked all the right questions and made sure that everything that should be done was done. Every time I would ask a question about the kids, he already had it taken care of. I wish I could have been well enough to celebrate his birthday in style. He deserves that and more. But he informed me that he was already given the best gift of all, and that was me, getting better. I definately couldn't buy THAT at the store.

I'll be around in a couple of days. The doctor I saw today is going to try and lower my dosage of meds so that I won't be so tired. We'll see how that goes in the next couple of days.

Until then friends, be well. Hug your family, tell the people in your life how much you love them. I want to leave you with this....

Take a moment right now and feel your pulse. Put your hand over your heart and just feel it beat. Tonight when your snuggling against your loved one, put your head on his/her chest and just listen to the beat of their heart. This is what is important. Don't take your heart or your health, for that matter, for granted. What could be fine today could be not-so-fine tomorrow. Take the time to appreciate your heart. It is, after all, one of the most important organs in your body.

HUGS!
Grace

Greetings from Bossman

Hello it's Bossman. Grace has given me her password and asked me to post some news regarding her health.

Last week almost exactly 7 days ago tonight she started feeling sick and developed a temperature of 102. Everything looked like it was a flu or cold since she had a high temperature and some aches and pains. One concern she had was a little chest pain but nothing that bad. So as the days progressed she got a little worse but nothing more than you would expect from a cold. By Wednesday her temp had gone down and it looked like she was on the way to recovery.

Thanksgiving morning she woke up about 9am and realized we needed some additional supplies from the grocery store. She was still feeling a little sick but was tired of being in the house so she went to the store by herself. (that's my headstrong Grace for you) While at the store she became light headed and felt like she was going to pass out. She sat down for a few minutes and felt better. After she got home she was feeling like something was not right. After about an hour her heart began beating kinda weird and she had a panicky feeling that overwhelmed her. I was extremely worried and rushed her down to the urgent care center. She went straight in without waiting and was hooked up to a monitor. They took one look at her heart rhythm and called an ambulance to take her to the hospital immediately. Of course we were totally freaked out!!! It turns out her heart was beating between 150 and 200 beats per minute. The normal is between 60 and 90. So after about 4 hours of medication and tests in the ER and getting calmed down they were able to get her heart to beat at a rhythm of about 80 beats per minute. Everything looked good so we went home a few hours later.

Then the next morning she got up and felt better and started getting ready for the day. Everything was going fine until about 4pm All of a sudden it hit again! She was panic'd and began to loose the ability to make decisions and function. I RUSHED her out the door and to the emergency room again. This time they said we are admitting her and running more tests. It took about 4 hours but they finally were able to get her heart beating normally again by adjusting the medication. They ran every test in the book. (The bill will probably be as much as a new Ferrari but I don't care if it's a billion dollars Grace is the world to me.)

Sooo what was the problem? The doctor said it was probably something called
A-tra-fibulation. (I'm guessing I spelled that wrong) Now this could be caused from a viral infection and go away or be just a random thing that happened and may be something she will have for a longer period of time. The good news is that all of her tests came back normal. Her heart is strong and in perfect health, her chest x-rays and bloodwork have all been normal.

So we have been at the hospital for the last 2 days just returning home today about 2pm. I had 3 hours of sleep over a 48 hour period because I was so worried. But the last 36 hours her heart has been in a normal rhythm beating at about 65-70 beats per minute. She is feeling much better especially after getting some additional rest today. I'm still nervous though and watching her like a hawk. Some of the tests have not come back yet but as of right now she is resting comfortably in the bedroom and her heart rate and blood pressure are normal.

You know the weirdest thing about this whole thing is she has had no pain. In fact the worst pain was the 10 tries for an IV and all the blood they took from her. When her heart was like that it was not painful just made her panic.

She wanted to take a few days off from here but did say she would get back on here and post again real soon. I sincerely appreciate all of the positive and well wishing comments you have given. Reading her comments always makes her smile and she really tries hard to answer each one of you. I want to personally thank you for your concern and how you make this a fun and exciting place to interact. I know my writing is not as good as Grace's but I hope I have shed some light on where she has been. If you have any questions I will be reading her comments and relaying messages to her until she get's on here.

Bossman

Sick

Hi everyone!

Just wanted you all to know that I have been very sick the last couple of days. I'm still recovering, but it's taking me longer than I thought. Just sitting here typing this is making me dizzy.

Just know that I am hanging here there, and Bossman is taking extra good care of me.

I will try and get to a decent post and to all my e-mail as soon as I am able.

If I can't make it here by Thursday, I want to wish you all a very Happy Thanksgiving!

(I'd give hugs, but I don't want anyone else to get sick!)

Grace

Up, up and away

Underware: I feel so naked without them. Pulling them down for a spanking is soooo sexy!

Up: When I die, I plan on going UP, not down. Although I'm sure you all can't possibly believe that!

Umbrella: Handy for rain, even handier for killing big spiders! (ok, I panicked!)

Uranus: I just love saying that word!

Umbilical cord: Although the umbilical cord gives life to the fetus. In this case it gave life to my beautiful children.

Uterus: I love being a woman. Plus, that was a great place for my fetuses to grow!

Un: Most of the words I thought of started with Un. Un is great. It means we can undo mistakes that we made. It means we can untie our shoes as soon as we walk in the door. We can unmake the bed, when we are feeling frisky. The sound of a belt being unbuckled makes my heart skip a beat. Unlucky is what happens when I play the lotto. Unbreak my heart, by Toni Braxton, used to be my favorite song. Uncovering my spanking needs has led to some unforgettable experiences. The love I have for Bossman is undying.

USA: I am proud to be an American. Doesn't matter what political party I am. Doesn't matter if I agree or disagree with the war. Doesn't even matter if I like or dislike our President. I would still choose to be an American. The land of the Free and the home of the Brave!

Well, there you have it the U's. Hope you all have an unsually unique day!

later....

Driving Miss Daisy

I survived the birthday!

My house is still standing. The cake has been eaten. The presents have been opened and NOW, now comes the most dreadful news of all.

The wildchild wants to drive.

Her Grandma graciously gave my daughter 200 bucks so she can take the driving class. (Thanks MOM!) That means she can now get her driving permit.

So, this is a warning. Really, it's a public service announcement.

Stay off the sidewalks people! As a matter of fact, if I were you, I'd stay indoors. I wouldn't even think of heading out the door. Nope, I'm telling you, it's just not safe.

As for me, I've purchased the helmet, googles, scarf (just so I can look cool) and the driving gloves. I'm debating on whether or not I should just get a blindfold so I don't have to watch my own execution. I'm also considering body armor, but isn't that saying, I don't trust you?

I've got out the Barry Manillow tapes for cruising, and I'm hoping between the music and the outfit this will have her deciding that driving with mom is too embarrassing.

Think it will work?

I'll let you know.....

later....

Sweet 16

My lovely daughter is 16 today.

Let me tell you about the day I found out I was pregnant.

It was our anniversary the week before. Our one year anniversary. We decided to go to Las Vegas. Neither of us had been as adults, so we thought it would be fun. We were both 21.

We woke up the day of the trip, and Bossman went out to fill the car with gas while I did last minute packing. 2 seconds after leaving, he was back. The car had been broken into the night before. The side rear window was broken out. The radio was gone. Instead of leaving for Vegas, we were filing police reports. Apparently there were numerous break ins in our area that night.

Should we cancel the trip? Nah, we were young and we wanted to get out of town. So we taped cardboard to our window, and left.

We ended up having a great time in Vegas. We had lots to talk about on the way, it was a 7 hr drive and with no radio, talking was all we had. We checked out all the sights, did some gambling. We walked and walked.

Now, unfortunately, I was pretty sure I was going to start my period any day. I had a prescription for *birth control in my purse, just waiting to be filled. In those days, you were suppose to wait until your period started before starting the pill.

So, we walked and walked and I was soooo tired. I had never felt this tired before. I knew my period was coming, but this was ridiculous. When we got back to the hotel room, I was bushed. I laid down for a minute and was out like a light. Poor Bossman thought I was sick.

But we did have a great time, and when we came home, I still hadn't started that period. I am pretty regular, so this was weird for me.

A few days after getting home, I stopped by to see my mom. I had pictures I wanted to show her. I mentioned that I hadn't started my period and she slyly asks, "do you think your pregnant?" Hmmm, I hadn't thought of THAT!

Oh my goodness! Do you think? Well, I told my mom, I don't know, I guess I'll wait a few more days and see. I'm sure I'll start any day.

A few hours later she calls me. "Did you know you can go down to the clinic and they will give you a pregnancy test?" "But, you have to go on Thursdays."

Tomorrow was Thursday. That night, I tell Bossman what I think. He's as surprised as I am. "Let's go tomorrow then."

Bright and early the next morning we head to the clinic. Bossman was the only male in the room. There were alot of women with lots of little kids running around.

I pee in the cup and then we wait...and wait...and wait....

Finally we are called in. I guess it's usually just a woman that goes, because there was only one chair to sit in. So Bossman had to stand. The doctor sits behind her desk and says..."Well, your test came back positive."

I was shocked. I couldn't believe it. I looked up at Bossman, who was standing next to me and he says..."So, uh, what does that mean?"

TOO FUNNY!

I bust out laughing. "It means we are going to have a baby!"

The look on his face was priceless. It was shocked, scared, worried and I think there was a little awe on his face as well.

It was a surprise to say the least, but it was a wonderful surprise! It was the best surprise. It was a magical day.

8 months later we had a beautiful bundle of love. All sugar, lots of spice.

16 years later, she is still sugar and spice. She's also wild and talented and free-spirited. She's part me, and part him. She's got his musical abilities and his curly hair. She's got my chin and my eyes. She's dramatic and she's kind. She's everything I wish I was, and some things I wish she wasn't. She's the best and the worst of both of us and I wouldn't have her any other way.

Sweet 16 and I love her to death!

later....

*I still have the birth control prescription. It's in her baby book!

Tea for Two

~The letter T~

Tea: Tea is excellent. I love iced tea and hot tea! Give me tea with honey or with My honey and I'm pretty happy to have Tea!

Toast: Toast is great with tea in the morning1

T....: Is my real name. It's a name like no other. Nobody can say it right and nobody can spell it right. I've never met another with the same name as mine. Yes, I have googled it. Apparently we are out there, but I've never met one in person.

Target: I really love the store Target. It has such a wonderful assortment of stuff. I love stuff.

Tantrums: Tantrums are fun when you need to let off a little steam. However,I wouldn't recomment it when Bossman is around with the BS.

Toilet paper: I sure am grateful for Toilets, but the paper makes it even better. Can't imagine wiping without it.

Tinker toys: Remember playing with Tinker toys? They bring back such fond memories of childhood with my brother and sister.

Tracks: Race tracks, bear tracks, the tracks my kitten left of paper down the hall.

Trick or treats: The candy is great, but not good for the waist. Can't seem to say away from all the treats.

Travel: I love exploring new places.

Trouble: It manages to find me wherever I go, I think it's my middle name.

Tinkerbell: I do believe in fairies, I do, I do!

Tonka trucks: My son loved his tonka trucks. I'm a little sad that he is slowly outgrowing them.

Trains: My Grandad worked in the train industry. Bossman has a train layout in the garage.

Turkey: I love to eat turkey and Thanksgiving is just around the corner.

Trays: Whatever would I carry my fast food on?

Taco Bell: This is the place I use the trays!

Tinsel: Christmas is just around the corner!!!

Tongues: What could would Taco Bell be without a tongue to taste it with? (What'd ya think I was gonna say?)

Togas: Doesn't a toga party with all of us there sound like FUN??

Tickle me Elmo: Who doesn't like a toy that laughs?

Texas: The state my brother was born! Hot as heck, but fond memories!

Tutu: Little girls in tutus! How cute is that?

Tuesday: What a wonderful day to be grateful!

later....

*update* There is one T that at the moment I am not so grateful for. Throw-up. That is what my son decided to do last night and this morning. Needless to say, I did not need this on birthday week! Oh well, that's my life.....

Thank you

I just wanted to thank all of you for your wonderful comments on Friday. It's such a pleasure to know so many people are reading and actually coming back. To all my friends, thank you! Thank you for taking time to read and respond to my blog. You all make this so much fun! I didn't start out writing for others, but what a bonus it is to have you all here.

To the other readers, Thank you! It is such a surprise to find out people are actually enjoying what I have to say. It would be lovely if you would continue to leave a comment now and then, but if you can't or don't, just know that I know you are there, and I thank you.

Now, just in case any of you missed it, you might want to go look at my comments from the last post one more time. I just had a surprise comment from the love of my life, BOSSMAN!!! I guess he stopped by while I was sleeping last night! What a pleasant surprise! I sure do love that man!

Now, on to other news.

This is the week my wildchild turns 16. Wednesday is the official day, but the birthday week started on Saturday. Since my MIL (mother-in-law) is crazy, and I mean that in the nicest way, we can't have her over when others are over. She is the type of person that gets along with NO ONE! So, we had her over for lunch on Saturday to celebrate the birthday, along with Bossmans sister. My best friend, who is a saint from heaven came over as well. I call her a saint because she is the only one brave enough to come over when my MIL is over. She has seen this woman at her worst, she has even taken some of her wrath and yet, she still comes over when she is here. Thank GOD for good friends like that.

Let me just tell you a little about the MIL. First off, she has a myspace. Now, that wouldn't be too weird except....she only has ONE person that she officially knows in person. I know, you're thinking whats the difference between what she does and what I'm doing here? I'll tell you. Myspace is real. She has her real name and real pictures of herself and family on this site. She talks about the Bible and her beliefs. That wouldn't be so bad, but there is one other thing that she talks about, racial discrimination. Now, don't get me wrong, I am against racial stuff too. But my MIL wishes she was black. (she's not, but my FIL is half black, but looks white.) She claims that people have discriminated against her because she's married to a black man...AGAIN...I repeat...he doesn't even LOOK black. Another HUGE problem, she thinks these people are all REAL. Again, don't get me wrong, I think you're all real, but if Madonna or Michael Jackson left me a comment, I highly doubt it would be the real deals. She had the "night stalker" comment on her site, so she thought it was the real one. She said she was going to have to go to his parole hearing and make sure he didn't get out of jail because otherwise he would come after her because she deleted his comments. We tried telling her it wasn't the real guy, we even did a search on myspace and came up with 300+ "night stalker" websites. So, like I said, she's a little on the crazy side, and really, I do mean that in the nicest way!

Ok, enough about her. Back to my daughters birthday. On Wed. we will have MY side of the family over for cake and presents. THEN on Thursday, (no school on Friday) she is having friends over for videos and the GIRLS only will spend the night. Bossman and I agreed to leave the house for a couple of hours....I'm SOOO nervous about this. I've NEVER let her be home alone with friends. And now I'm allowing it with 10 friends! I'll let you know on Friday if this was a good idea or not.

So like I said, this is birthday week. For some reason the movie "Sixteen Candles" keeps running through my mind. Of course I could NEVER forget her birthday, as she reminds us on a daily basis and there is a running countdown on the calendar AND she has even programmed my phone to give me a reminder...EVERYDAY!!! (somebody help me turn that OFF!!!)

So, that's what my week will be like. Too much cake, too many teens in my house and a beautiful 16 year old that just wants to get her drivers license. (That is a discussion for another post)

Now, what the heck do I get the girl that has everything already and only wants money? Any ideas? She doesn't want make-up, can't buy her clothes, has every electronic device she could possibly need. I'm leaning toward jewelry. But ideas would be nice.

In other news, I got spanked last week. Bossman has been getting on me for slacking off. It's true. I slacked off big time last week. And then, I really screwed up. We went to the store, and I thought he was behind me, but he thought I was still in the car, so I was in the store and he was outside the store, waiting for me. YIKES, it sounds bad, I know. See, I get out of the car rather quickly. I walk quickly, Bossman takes longer. I have a hard time waiting for him. I'm always far ahead of him and this is quite a pet peeve of his. I don't blame him. I would be annoyed if he did that to me. So, this is something we've been working on. Since this latest problem was the worst, the spanking was pretty bad. The back scratcher really did the job well. Believe it or not, I think I would rather have the wooden spoon than that stupid BS. (ahhhh, that will be the name for it for now on...BS!) I never thought I would say that. The wooden spoon has always been scary for me. Now I'm thinking that the BS is worst! Maybe it just depends on how upset the hand that holds it actually is....could that be it?

Well, whatever it is, it hurt! Next time I go to the store with Bossman, I will be the last to get out of the car and I will hold his hand all the way there.

I know this was a long post, but I will be so busy with birthday that I may not get to post much this week. Therefore I left you with a post that you can read all week long!!! Wasn't that nice of me??

later.....

Welcome

Hi everyone!

Thank you for stopping by today! Today is the day I invite YOU...that's right..YOU to leave a comment on my blog.

I know you. You love to jump from blog to blog looking for something interesting that someone has written. You're nervous about commenting. Afraid it might sound dumb. Believe me, I've been there. I've done that. Heck, I still do that!

But listen, it's ok. It's ok to leave a comment on a blog. Nobody will know it's you. You can be completely anonymous. I promise no one will ever know!

So please, leave me a comment. I would love to hear from you. I've really made some wonderful friends here. Except for Eva, they are a pretty nice bunch. (You gotta watch that Eva, she's tries to give out MATH problems...YUCK!)

I would love to make new friends. But if you don't want to be a friend, that's ok too. Just a comment letting me know that you read here is fine. Even just a "HI" would be nice.

So please, come on, do it just this once...leave me a comment. I promise I don't bite! Ok, I bite a little, but I never leave lasting marks! (Don't tell Eva, she thinks I don't bite.)

Oh, I should warn you...Elis said we weren't perverted, but she was only speaking for herself...me? I'm REALLY perverted, and weird...I'm really, really weird.

Ok, now don't forget to comment! It's just one click away...it's right there...right under this post. It won't hurt a bit, I PROMISE!

HUGS!
grace

please get that candy away from me

Halloween was a great success at our house! The little man went as a ninja and my wildchild when as a pirate. Have you seen the costumes that the high schoolers are wearing??? Since when did Halloween become "dress as a slut" day? I had to veto numerous outfits before I would let my daughter out of the house. Sheez!

Bossman decided to dress up this year. He took out a white sheet, cut two eyes and wa-la, instant costume. Believe it or not, but he went out trick or treating in that sheet. He actually went up to a couple of houses and got on his knees, people thought he was a kid. I was hysterical laughing! My 6 foot 4 tall husband walking around with a sheet over his head was comical to say the least.

Now there is this problem of candy. It's everywhere, and I can't keep my hands off it. There are candy wrappers covering my desktop right now! HELP!

Ok, now on to other news.

I wanted to thank you all for your response to my sex-drive post. I was really nervous about posting it. I wasn't sure what kind of response I would get. I was surprised at the number of e-mails I recieved. There are plenty of us going through this very problem. It truly makes things easier to handle when you know you're not the only one going through it.

So, thank you all for your support. Things in my marriage are going great right now. Sex is good, spankings are few, but good.

But please, someone take this candy away....PLEASE!

later.....

Thankful

Today is S, and there are plenty of S's out there! Since there were so many, I decided it was too hard to pick my favorites. Therefore, I leave you with a little something that my mom e-mailed to me. I thought it was perfect for Gratitude Tuesday!

Happy Halloween everyone!


I AM THANKFUL:
FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.

FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING
DISHES BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS
AT HOME, NOT ON THE STREETS.

FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED

FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.

FOR THE CLOTHES THAT
FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.

FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE

FOR A LAWN THAT
NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING, AND
GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME

FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH.

FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END
OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF
WALKING AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED
WITH TRANSPORATION.

FOR MY HUGE HEATING
BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.

FOR THE LADY BEHIND
ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I CAN HEAR.

FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.

FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.

FOR THE ALARM THAT
GOES OFF IN THE
EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.

AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.

later......

You all are too smart!

I love hanging around the smart people. They always make me look WAY smarter than I actually am.

With that said, I'm so proud of you all for guessing that I wrote The Perfect Night. Congrats to all of you, smartie pants!

First of all, I just want you to know, I wrote this story over 5 years ago. It was something I wrote to Bossman to give him an idea of what I was looking for in a spanking. I added the bj part because really, don't bj's sound so hot in a good spanking story? Plus, I was hoping the bj part would make him more interested in trying spanking. I figured I had to give something if he was going to give something to me. I really did mean everything I said in the bj post. I really don't like giving them. So I didn't write it just to throw you all off. Besides, I KNEW you were all too smart for that!

Anyway, thanks for all the compliments. I'm glad you enjoyed, because really, that's what Fantasy Friday is all about!


later......

Oh, I forgot to add how thrilled I am that I fooled Dante!!! It's a thrill to know he thought Tig wrote it. To be held in such high regard is an honor!

weather

You Are Sunshine

Soothing and calm You are often held up by others as the ideal But too much of you, and they'll get burned You are best known for: your warmth Your dominant state: connecting

What Type of Weather Are You?

I got this at her website. Hope you don't mind, Cathy!

later......

How's your sex drive?

I have a friend named kitten. I've been reading her blog for a long time. Some of her posts have dealt with the fact that her hubby doesn't have much of a sex drive. They have been having a hard time working through it all, but I'm hopeful that they are working toward a resolution.

This brings me to my own sex drive. Believe it or not, I can relate to her problem. Unfortunately, I can relate to her hubby, CD, more.

This is hard to admit, but I feel like if I'm going to be honest on this blog, I need to admit this, because if you read my blog regularly, you could easily get the impression that I don't have a problem in the sex area of my marriage. But, I do. Or did, or sometimes do. There, I said it.

Now, I have to explain it, and that's where it gets hard.

Actually, just so this doesn't sound too horrible, things aren't as bad as they used to be. So, there is light at the end of the tunnel. But things have been very black.

When Bossman and I first got married, we were both very young. Neither of us had ever had sex with anyone else. We still haven't. We were inexperienced, to say the least. So, who's to say what is normal and what isn't when you're that young? We certainly didn't know.

Bossman has always had a strong sex drive. Actually, to be accurate, he's probably just a normal average male, with a normal, average, sex drive. Me? not so much. I have a much harder time getting into a sexual mood. I don't like being touched. That last sentence makes me sad. How does a person not like to be touched? How is it that I don't want my husband touching me? It's just wrong.

So in the beginning, things weren't so good. He wanted sex a lot, I didn't. I think it was a couple of years before I even had orgasm with him. I could give myself one, but with him...I didn't think that would ever happen. One of the biggest problems was communication. I would never think of telling him where to touch me to make me have an "O". So that was a problem. But a bigger part of my problem was, even if Bossman was just going to cuddle with me, I would back away. In my mind, even a cuddle was going to lead to sex and I wasn't in the mood for sex. So, just a cuddle, or a caress would send me scurrying to the edge of the bed. On the other hand, there were times when I thought Bossman was just being overly sensitive by my rejection, that I had given him MORE than enough and I really was a sexual person, he just didn't get me.

kitten says in her blog that CD said, "there's just no satisfying you". I cringed when I read that. It sounds so harsh. Sad thing is, I've said the same thing to Bossman.

Now, for one moment, I'd like to be on kitten and Bossmans side of the coin. To say there is no satisfying you, is unfair. Sexual desire is not gone once you have sex. It's completely normal to want sex the next day. It's human nature to desire sex. Most humans crave human touch. Humans are much happier when they are touched and loved. If our sexual desire was fulfilled once we had sex, we'd only have to have sex to have babies. Because our sexual desire would be fulfilled. Right?

Then there's the rejection. How does it feel to be rejected by the person that is suppose to love you most? Even if that person tells you, "it's not you" how can you not feel rejected? How do you get over the hurt?

But on my side of the coin it feels like I can't do enough. I feel like I gave you sex last night, now you should be good. You should be happy with that. You should be fulfilled. Right?

Now, what about the "pity" sex? What about those times I just gave in, just to get you off my back. I gave in because I didn't want to see the look of hurt and disappointment in your eyes again. Plus, I wanted to shed myself of some of the guilt that comes with denying the person you love, the love and touch that they need and deserve. But, you and I both know, my heart wasn't in it. I also know, the guilt didn't disappear, it only got worse. Is that fair? To either of us?

There are times when I feel like an utter failure. I feel like I'm not a normal person. I feel like I'm defective. My heart and soul are with the man that I love, but I can't give him what he needs. This breaks my heart.

I know what my problem is. Bossman knows what my problem is. Knowing what the problem is, doesn't make it any easier. Plus, I'm not one to use what happened to me in the past to excuse what is happening now. But sometimes you just can't push what happened to you aside and pretend that it didn't happen. Yes, I was sexually abused as a child. I only tell you this so you will understand. I didn't say this to make you feel sorry for me. It was a very long time ago, and I have made peace with it. Pity me not, for I survived and it's made me the person I am today.

Well, this post doesn't have any answers. I have no idea what changed in me. I still have bad times. I still have times when I just don't want to be touched. Nowadays these times seem to be only when I'm hormonal. But I still get those same old "bad" feelings from time to time. Finding out what turns me on was a big step in the right direction. Spanking spiced up our life and made us get a lot closer together. Letting Bossman know that quickies can relieve some sexual tension on days when I'm not in the mood isn't such a bad thing. Quickies don't have to equal "pity" sex. And truthfully, nine times out of ten, once the quickie starts the "bad" feelings start feeling good. Of course, communication is the key.

It truly is a sad place to be, when you can't find that loving feeling with the person you love. It makes you feel like a failure. It's makes you feel like your partner could do so much better with someone else. It makes you question your relationship and your love for your partner. The worst part is, it makes you wonder how your partner could ever love you.

I'm one of the lucky ones. I have a husband that never gave up on me. Bossman stuck with me though all of it. Somewhere along the line I made some self discoveries. I discovered that I am a sexual being. I discovered what makes me tick. Discovering and admitting that I am turned on by spankings is what helped me. It has helped me to communicate things to Bossman that I would never has told him before. It helped us become closer to each other, which in turn, helped me to want to have sex with my husband. My sex drive is in much higher gear than it ever was before. For that, I am truly grateful.

Bossman, I know you will probably read this. When you do, I want you to know, it isn't your fault. It was never your fault. You were a victim. But you were also the hero. You have stayed by me and loved me even when things were rough. I'm sorry you had to go though rejection and hurt and that it was caused by me. If I could take back all that hurt, I would. Since I can't, I can only say, I'm sorry. It was never my intention to hurt you. I love you and I always will.

Thank you for not giving up on me. I think I'm the luckiest person in the world.

As a matter of fact....I know I am.

later.....

BJ

I have a confession to make.

My confession is, I hate giving blowjobs. I KNOW! I can hear the gasping around the world.

People, I've tried. I've tried to like them. I've tried to find my inner slut. You know, the one we all have inside us that makes us feel sexy and erotic. The one that makes blow jobs sound like yummy lollipops and ice cream cones. She's not there. I don't think I have an inner slut. Either that, or she's lost and can't find her way home.

Either way, I don't like blow jobs. My jaw hurts, my cheeks get tired, I gag. Having my head moved back and forth while sucking on my husbands cock doesn't make me feel more submissive, it makes me feel ridiculous. It's just uncomfortable. Believe me when I say, we've tried all ways. We've tried all positions. I just can't get into it. Turns me off, completely.

Needless to say, this does not please Bossman. He's a man, he's a red-blooded, sexy MALE! I've yet to come across a male that doesn't like his cock sucked on. So, once in a great while, I take pity on the man and give a little suck. I usually do this when we are in the shower. I find I can tolerate it much better in the shower. There aren't any weird smells, there aren't any weird tastes, and water makes everything a little more erotic, even if it's something you detest. Ok, I will admit, around christmas time last year, I put some hot chocolate in my mouth and then sucked on him, I will say, that was pretty erotic, and Bossman really like that...but still...

So, tell me, am I the only one? Are there others that feel this way, or am I just a horrible wife? Are there some hidden secrets that nobody has told me that could help me with this problem? Or am I just a weird breed that just can't get into a good blow job?

Feel free to feel sorry for Bossman!

later.......

Raindrops on Roses

Rain drops - Bossman and I love to walk in the rain. A rainy day with a good book, doesn't get better than that.

Roses- my favorite flower

Rosy bottoms- need I say more?

Razor- shaving the "kitty" (sorry Elis) is always fun if Bossman does it for me.

Right arm - Since I'm right handed, my right arm comes in handy.

races- Bossman loves nascar, so I am a fan by default! (Go Jeff Gordon!)

railroads - Again, Bossman has a passion for trains, big and small, so by default, I love the railroad too!

rubbers- very handy if you don't want a baby.

radio - what would I listen to in my car? My self? ewww, boring!

Richard - the name of my beloved Grandfather who passed away in 1988.

Rams - Once more by default, Bossmans favorite football team!

roller skating - This is where Bossman and I met.

Last but not least - redheads - My little man is a red head. He is the sweetest little boy in the world. He's tough as nails on the football field, but cuddley and sensitive at home. I wouldn't trade my red-head in for anything in the world, he is one of my most treasured loves.

Well, my brain is elsewhere today, so this is a very short list. I hope you all have a really Rosy Tuesday!

later......

On the 7th day, God created blogs

This post was written last week in response to Eva's post. I though it was a good time to explain how I came to this crazy blogland. Then last night I go over to Elis's blog and she asks the very question that I answered with this post. I'm willing to give her the credit, but I DID think of this first!

Just so you know, the only reason this wasn't posted sooner was because I got a great spanking and had to share, I mean really, spanking is much more important than how my blog got started....isn't it??

So here is how I came to be in blogland.
I started this blog, March 30th, 2004. When I started this blog, I wasn't concerned with people reading it. I didn't open comments, I didn't even make it public. I just wrote. I didn't think anyone would care what a boring housewife had to say.

I went back and read my old posts. Wow, I was a mess. I seemed to be down a lot. Maybe I only had stuff to write about when it was bad. If you go back and read that stuff, it's really boring. I just wrote about life, as it happened, whenever I felt the urge. Again, I didn't think anyone was reading, so it didn't really matter.

As time marched on, there were times when I didn't write for a long time. Once in awhile I would post something, but generally I didn't bother too much with it. I did eventually open the comments, but I never expected anyone to comment. I made the blog public and just kept writing.

During this time, I was a lurker to many blogs. I didn't comment because I felt like I had nothing important to add. I don't know much, I don't have much experience in the spanking world. I just knew I liked to read what others had to say.

One day, I got the courage to comment. It was probably something simple like, I agree, or bravo, or thanks for the great story. I'm sure it wasn't anything thought provoking. As I go to post the comment, it asks for my link, my blogger link. Wow, should I add it? Would someone actually click on it? What would I do if someone actually read my own blog? Yikes!!! That was a big step.

I did it. I left my link. Someone would read my comment, and if they choose, they could click on my blog. Oh well, I figured they would click on it, read two words, and click right off. I mean really, do I have anything important to add? Not really. July of 2004, I opened the comments. I know this because if you click on the comments, there is one comment from me that says nice blog. It was just me, testing to see if it worked. If you look a few posts later, you'll see a comment from Bossman. Before he commented, I wasn't sure if he read it. I told him about it, but he's not much of a reader, so I didn't think he would be interested in my little blog of nothing.

Then, one day, there was a comment. One of my favorite bloggers, the one where I left my first comment, left me a comment. ME! Oh wow. This blogger, (who has since stopped blogging) was the person that led me to the blogging world. She was in a d/d club on yahoo that I was in. I never left comments there either, but I read her stuff religiously. One day she said she was leaving the club, but if we wanted to keep up with her we could read her blog, and she left the link. I had NO clue what a blog was! Suddenly this whole world of blogging opened up before me. Anyway, she left me a comment. That meant someone was reading my blog. UH OH!

Well, I got braver and started commenting on other blogs. Just that alone started bringing people to my blog. Suddenly I was getting some comments. Then, not to long ago, Bonnie wrote a little piece about my blog. WHAT? Bonnie liked reading my blog? The queen of the spanking blog world liked my blog? And then others, like Mike, quoted something from my blog. Wow, this was exciting. This was cool, this was AWFUL! Suddenly I felt pressure to write something good. Something witty. Something wise. Yikes!!! I hate pressure. I don't think I have talent writing. I just write what I'm thinking. It doesn't always come out pretty. It doesn't always sound smart or funny. My spelling sucks, my punctuation is awful. I don't have the best grammar. So, I got all self conscience. Because NOW, I'm not just writing for myself, I'm writing for others.

But something wonderful happened. Nice people started stopping by. Really nice people that had nice things to say about my blog. Now I'm not one to worry about how many people read my blog. I have 2 counters on my blog, but I hardly ever look at them. Numbers don't really mean that much to me. In reality, the more people that I think are reading, the more self-conscience I become about my writing. So, I don't pay much attention to the numbers. Now, I started reading these nice peoples blogs, and WOW, we had a lot in common. These people know exactly what I'm going through. They have either been there, are there, or are trying to get there. Just like me.
Yes, if your reading this, then I'm talking about you. You guys make this fun.

So, I've decided something. I'm going to continue to write. I want to keep the friends I've made here in bloggerland. You may not gain any wisdom here on this blog. You may not find it funny. My grammer may suck and my spelling may be even worse. I may talk about spanking, or I may talk about dirty laundry. Either way, as long as it stays fun for me, I'll keep doing it. But most of all I'm just glad I have friends, because in the end, isn't nice to know you can come on the computer and find some like-minded people? I can't find that in my "real" world. At least not about spanking!

later.....

Q

We all know the Q's are going to be a little tougher to come up with, but I managed to think of some Q's today.

Quiet: I love the peace and quiet. No tv, no radio, just the sound of breathing makes me happy.

Quotes : I love reading all the famous quotes in Ceecis garden.

Quilts: It's so nice to cuddle under a warm quilt on a chilly winter night.

Quarters: Whenever we go out for pizza, we can keep the little man busy for hours if we have enough quarters to put in a video game.

Questions: How would we ever get the answers if we didn't ask the questions?

Quality: The quality of things is much better than the quantity, which brings me to...

Quantity: When getting a spanking, quantity counts.

Quiz: I love finding a quiz on Eva's blog. Just not the math ones!

Quickie: Sometimes having a quickie before getting up in the morning makes the day that much better.

Quiver: Sometimes those quickies make me quiver.

Quest: My spanking quest has made me much happier in life.

Queen: In case you didn't know, I'm the queen of everything. Even if I wear my crown, my kids don't believe me.

Quit: I guess I'll quit this list now. But isn't it nice when it's quitting time at work? Quitting my job was the best thing I ever did.

Seems Q wasn't so hard to come up with after all!

later.....

FYI

It’s official. Ceeci was correct.

He is a she. Mr. Kittles is really Ms. Kittles.

We took (him) her to the vet this morning to get neutered. Turns out, (he) she needs to be spayed instead.

Ceeci was correct when she said that tri-colored calico cats are always female. The vet took one look at (him) her without even looking at (his) her butt and determined that indeed he is a she.

Surprise!

I just wanted you all to know I looked at that cats butt more times than I care to admit. I studied photos on the internet to determine what I was looking for. All I really know now is I would not make a good vet.

That and, my cat is a girl!

And I wondered why the little one wouldn’t answer to (his) her name. She was offended to be called a MR.!


Enough of the cat already. Guess what happened this weekend. No, it wasn’t a spanking. Why would you even think there would be a spanking?

Friday I got my hair cut. Oh, and I look cute too. It’s a lot shorter but still, I look cute. And yes, it’s definitely blonde. (elis)

Anyway, on Saturday Bossman and I went to a parents night out party for football. I thought I was looking very cute. My hair looked cute, I had on cute pants. I even had a lacy blouse that I bought last month that I haven’t worn yet, that looked cute.

We get to the dinner and it’s a lot of football people. We meet up with some of the parents from our team. One of the other couples shows up and ~sigh~ she’s wearing the same blouse!

Oh well, I think I looked cuter than she did. Yep, Bossman says I did, so that's really all that matters!

That and my cat is a girl!

later..........

Happy Birthday Paul!

I remembered the presents.


I got some balloons. I even got candles.

And lots of cake too!











So, lets have a party and celebrate Paul, because he is our Friend and a mentor to ALL!

Happy Birthday Sweet Man! Extra BIG HUGS on your special day!

Grace

wonderful, loveable, super-fun, very good day

Yesterday was terrific!

First there was this great post. I laughed my ass off! It was so funny and sweet. Just made my day complete. (I'm a poet and didn't know it...)

Ok, I thought my day was complete, until Bossman showed up at lunch time.

Here's the deal, I didn't have a very good Tuesday. Actually, my day was great, but I didn't get anything done. I pretty much lazed around, getting drunk on blogs. Thats right people, I said it, drunk on blogs. You know that feeling?? The one where you've been on the computer for WAY too long and you can barely get out of the computer chair? Your butt has completely melted into the seat of the chair, becoming one with the chair. You've held your pee in so long, that once you stand, you somehow have to make it to the bathroom without having an accident. The area around your computer looks like snack hell, ding dong wrappers, pepsi cans, chip crumbs, the breakfast bowl from 6 hours ago.

Well, I don't know if you realize this, but there is a hang over after being blog drunk. Believe me people when I say, it's not pretty. The drunken blog hang over consists of me being extra cranky. All that junk food, limited movement, (oh, my hands and fingers are really in shape!) and eyeball dryness, really take a toll on my body. So Tuesday night, with blog hangover in full effect, I was CRANKY!

Bossman was not to pleased with the results of me spending all day on the computer. Not only was I a cranky lady, but the house was a mess. I don't understand the problem really, I mean, why make the bed, it's just gonna get messed up again that night. And so what if Bossman doesn't have clean underwear, I didn't have time to buy him some more. (I KNOW, I just posted about dirty laundry. But Eva did point out how very inconsistent I am.)

As a result, Bossman informed me, he would be home to take care of me tomorrow. Somehow, I got the feeling this is NOT the kind of taken care of that would bode well for my bottom.

So yesterday, after a wonderful morning of reading blogs, I figured I better get some stuff done. After reading Evas blog, I was in a terrific mood so cleaning was a breeze. I threw laundry in, cleaned the bedroom, made the bed, you know, all that fun stuff. I figured if I made an effort, things might not go so bad later...if you know what I mean.

Bossman did come home for lunch. I had hoped he might have forgotten, but I was pretty sure he didn't. He saw that I had made an effort, but after he was done eating, he said those inevitable words...we need to talk. This while walking down the hall to the bedroom. Uh oh. This wasn't looking good for me.

I spent the next 15 minutes over his lap being "talked" to. Bossman likes to use the woodenspoon and paintstirrer for these so called "talks". He communicates very well with them, I might add.

I didn't have much to say after that. Pretty much ow and ouch were the only things coming out of my mouth.

30 minutes later, I was at my sons school. It was a room mother tea, so we could discuss with the teachers about parties and such. I had to sit on those yucky metal chairs. Oh yeah baby, fun, fun, fun!

But you know something, looking back on yesterday, I only look back with fondness. It really was a great day. I mean really, great friend writes a nice post about you, hubby spanks your butt. Who could ask for anything more????

later.....